I am no Donna Reed. I hate to clean. I don’t greet my husband at the door with his pipe and a glass of brandy. Dinner is rarely on the table. And I sure as hell don’t wear pearls.

But there is something about this 1950’s housewife stereotype that I just can’t shake? I know that all of this is not expected of me from the husbter. If I know all of this, why am I pushing this on myself?

I am finding myself getting incredibly mad at me when things aren’t done. When the sink is full of dirty dishes. When the laundry is still sitting in the basket. When the toys are all over the floor. When dinner is no where close to being on the table.

I am beating myself up inside while trying to appear to be “keeping it together” on the outside.

The only one who has these high expectations of me is me. The hubster doesn’t even bat an eye. He gets it. He knows that I do what I can during the day while spending time with the kids.

So why am I doing this to myself?

I truly had some lofty goals for myself going into this whole stay at home mom business. In actuality, I am not just a stay at home mom. I work. I work a lot. I work hard. It’s difficult to find a balance {what’s that?} in working, raising a family, keeping a home, and staying sane.

Unfortunately, I feel like my sanity is suffering. It’s all starting to become too much. I can’t do it all. This past weekend, I gave myself a free pass. A free pass to say it’s ok that it’s not all done. It will be there tomorrow {and the next day and the next day}. I gave myself a free pass to say “F it” and do what I wanted {but not really, but kind of}.

And because of that., I am drowning. I am running an even faster rat race to get it all done.

Why do we do this to ourselves?

Why do we run ourselves ragged to do what we think is expected of us?

When trying to keep all of these balls in the air, we are the ones who suffer. We are the ones who lose out.

So why?

If you can answer that question, please enlighten me. I would love you forever!

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